Furry Vengeance (Blu-ray)
A pushover real estate developer (Brendan Fraser) ends up in the middle of a woodland area that his boss is dead set upon turning into the next suburbia. If toughing out this drastic change wasn’t hard enough for him and his family, the local animals start coming out of the woodwork (I had to) to ensure this project’s demise.
Dear God where to begin. I’m not a fan of this animal craze Hollywood keeps clinging to with an iron fist. Watching animals do “cutesy” things, operate hi-tech machinery or in this particular case, lay siege to anyone or anything that messes with their forest homes doesn’t particularly impress me. Most of the animals found in this film are brainless pests in real life so watching them outsmart people, act surprised with eye bulging expressions, communicate to one another through a series of clouded blurbs and then pull off some insane booby trap action that would make MacGyver himself jealous with envy, came off as loathsome and ridiculous in my books.
To add insult to injury this story has been done a million times in both cartoons and film so having to sit through it again is a mind numbing slap in the face. We live in a day and age when the envelope must be pushed each and every day or audiences lose interest. I lost interest in this film after seeing the cover but it was only after the initial five to ten minutes that I began wishing I would suddenly go blind and deaf. The dialogue in this movie is pure murder and by that I mean they simply kill each and every attempt at humor by redoing the same lame jokes over and over until I shook my head and whispered, “Seriously, another poop joke?” Everything was overacted cheesed up here, brutally at that.
I’m mostly disappointed in Brendan Fraser. What happened to you Brendan? ENCINO MAN was a great way to come into the biz, sure you stumbled a bit with stuff like GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE but the first MUMMY film was a complete and total redeemer. That series started to lose its edge by the second (and was totally dull by the third) but at least you still had your dignity man! I was mortified to discover that Jeremy Piven was originally set to lead (Steve Carell also but that I could see), thankfully he didn’t or I would have a hard time enjoying ENTOURAGE. The only saving grace this film had talent wise was Ken Jeong (who’s always funny and a delight to see) but it pained me to see him here as this film is so far below him.
FURRY VENGEANCE stank to the high heavens with an uncanny vengeance. Some might try to defend this film in a “oh, but the kids will love it” sort of way but don’t believe the hype as any kid old enough to distinguish between cute animals and what’s really happening on screen will quickly lose interest. This film is not worth your time anymore than it was worth the time of those sad souls involved so don’t waste your money or your brain cells here as it would be about the equivalent to sniffing glue…no offence to glue.
BLU-RAY REVIEW
Video: 1.78:1 Widescreen in 1080p HD with AVC codec. The landscape looked fantastic in HD but that’s about all the flattering feedback I can give.
Audio: 5.1 DTS-HD in English, French and Spanish with the same subtitle options. Listening to the animals jabbering wasn’t nearly as annoying as the human jabbering.
Commentary (1:31:19): This commentary with director Roger Kumble, Brendan Fraser and Brooke Shields is hilarious as they all try so hard to glorify (and justify) this steaming nugget of crap. Thankfully we can’t see them as I doubt they could do so with straight faces.
Deleted Scenes (6:11): Three words: Brendan Fraser naked. No, it’s not flattering, anymore than extra screen time with him in his “yum yum” pink jumpsuit was. Terrible.
The Pitfalls of Pratfalls (9:57): Here we get the director explaining how and why Brendan Fraser was the guy they wanted (after Piven and Carell said no of course) as he fit the bill physically as far as all the zany animal abuse was concerned.
Working with Animals: A Profile of Kenn Beggs (8:42): Here we have animal trainer Kenn Beggs giving away all his trade secrets about how he gets these animals to walk the walk. I find it curious how they all go on like this was the first film to do something like this.
Gag Reel (3:54): There’s a lot of yelling and gibberish found herein but most of it is quite sad and just plain awful. Shame on them for implying this was funny.
Previews: There are a couple trailers that play before the feature as well as a DVD version of the film.
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